|A Disaster at the Beach|
Oh, come on babe!
|Other episodes by the author|
Red & Blue decide to go to the beach for a fun day. Well actually it WON'T be a good day!
- Lord Tourettes
- Lady Tourettes
- Chad Cop (in flashback)
- Fox (mentioned)
(shows a bunch of kids playing in water, girls lying under the umbrellas, and a guy slowly drowning with no one seeing him, zooms out to show Red & Blue with beach supplies)
Red: (excited) Alright! Wet boobies and sexy hot ladies!
Blue: Dude, don't get too excited.
Red: This will make up for LAST time! Hey laaadies! (runs off)
Blue: Red! Don't get us in trouble again! (runs after Red)
(shows Red having sex with a girl at the beach, when Chad Cop walks up to them)
Chad Cop: Sir, you two are hearby under arrest for sexuallty at the beach.
Red: (angry) What!? Why!?
Chad Cop: (points to kids) Those two kids are suddenly having SEX with each other!
Red: (looks at camera) Well that's just fucking great! No matter! I'll escape like last time!
(shows Red whining in his cell)
Red: (whines) What happened to my secret exit!?
Chad Cop: We blocked it up so you can't escape. (walks off)
Red: Noooooo!!!! (cries)
Red: Don't worry! I'll make sure that doesn't happen again!
(shows a guy and a girl about to kiss when a shark fin approaches them and they run off screaming, it's then shown Rapper to be disguising himself as a shark)
Red: (laughs) Great trick Rapper!
Rapper: (jumps out) Best trick I ever thunk of!
Red: (suddenly screams) Aaah! Rapper's become a shark! (runs off)
Rapper: (confused) What...... the...... fuck!?
(shows Raccoon just near the water looking nervous)
Raccoon: Oh sweet mercy.
Lord Tourettes: Come on little kitty! Don't be so FUCKED from the water!
Raccoon: That water wirr make my fur go so fruffy!
Broseph: What's the big wuss, bra?
Lord Tourettes: He's FUCKED of the water!
Broseph: (confused) What?
Raccoon: He means is dat-a I'm am-a not going in da water so my fur wirr not get wet.
Broseph: Oh really? (pushes Raccoon in the water) Now your not bro! (laughs)
Raccoon: (jumps out of water all fluffy) Rook what-a you did to my fur!
Broseph: (takes picture) Oh nice, bro! (laughs)
Raccoon: (raises middle finger) Fuck you!
Broseph: (shocked) Alright, I'm gonna back away now, bra. (walks back)
(shows Blue swimming in the water and swims up to Pink)
Blue: Hey Pink!
Pink: (nervous) Uh, hi Blue.
Blue: (notices) Pink, are you alright? You don't seem so happy to see me.
Pink: It's not you Blue, I just heard rumours that jellyfish are coming up to shore.
Blue: From where?
Pink: TV news. I don't wanna get stung by jellyfish!
Blue: (wraps arm around Pink) Don't worry Pink, I'll make sure nothing gets you. No jellyfish would come this close to sting you.
Pink: Thanks Blue.
Blue: (nervously laughs) No problem.
(Pink & Blue stare into each others eyes and lean close to kiss, before their mouths could even touch, Pink yelled in pain)
Blue: (worried) Pink! Are you alright? (checks on Pink) Did anything get you?
Pink: (cries) I think something just got my foot!
Blue: Let me see.
(Pink lifts her foot from the water and shows a sting on her sole)
Pink: I think a jellyfish got me!
Blue: Let me see. (begins checking on Pink's foot by looking and touching to check)
Pink: (laughs) Blue! That tickles! (laughs more)
Blue: No need to worry Pink, this is a tiny sting mark from a baby jellyfish. Which means that this won't do anything bad to you. But you should probably put a baindade on that.
Pink: (sighs of relief) Well that's good to hear.
Blue: Your lucky that was just a little jellyf- (yelps in pain) OW!
Pink: (worried) Blue?
Blue: (checks on his back to see a giant sting mark) HOLY SHIT! I just got stung by a BIG jellyfish! (faints in the water)
(Timecut, to Blue walking down the street with a bandage on his back)
Blue: (mumbling) Stupid jellyfish. They HAD to put in a needle to cure this sting!
(shows Jess sitting on the sand and Red walks up to her with sunglasses on)
Red: Sup baby?
Jess: (annoyed) Hi Red.
Red: Whatcha up to today bitch?
Jess: Just chilling at the beach.
Red: Well the beach got a whole lot better with this dumbass! (points to himself)
Jess: (more annoyed) Yeah right. I don't really like those who think their cool, I kind of like those who try not being cool. Like the same way Fox likes boys.
Blue: (in pain) Ow, my back.
Jess: (runs to Blue) Oh my, Blue! Are you okay?
Pink: He'll be fine. Just a few weeks and he'll be brand new.
Red: WHAT!? But Blue's lame!
Jess: I always thought it was you who was lame. Infact you just ruined my day. (walks away)
Red: Oh come on babe! Your acted like Fox the day she was at the beach!
(shows Raccoon seeing a shark and holding Broseph)
Broseph: This is like, crazy right?
Raccoon: Dis is for before, bitchu! (throws Broseph at the shark)
Broseph: AAAARRGGHHH!!!! (screams as the shark eats Broseph)
(shows Lady Tourettes walking down the street without her hat)
Lord Tourettes: BITCH! Where's your hat!?
Lady Tourettes: I LEFT it at home. Why are you so worried?
Lord Tourettes: (blushes) Uh, nothing!
Lady Tourettes: Wait a minute. Do You HAVE your hat on all the TIME?
Lord Tourettes: No!
Lady Tourettes: You DO don't you?
Lord Tourettes: Of COCK not!
Lady Tourettes: (glares) Do you? It's alright to TELL me.
Lord Tourettes: Alright, I do! And I always SHIT everytime I lose one!
Lady Tourettes: (places hand on L.T.'s cheek) Aww you cute thing. (kisses his cheek)
Lord Tourettes: (sniffs) Thanks COCK sucker!
(shows Red & Blue walking to the car)
Red: None of the ladies liked me today!
Blue: (groans) Let's just go home.
Red: (remembers) Oh yeah! I have a pet in the car to show you!
(in the car, Blue sees a puppy in the car)
Blue: (adores) Aww, you got a puppy?
Red: NO! (points) THAT'S my pet!
(suddenly a shark pops out and eats the puppy scaring the life out of Blue)
Blue: (screams) HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!!!!!!!
Red: Good boy Bruno!
- For some of you confused, Jess was wearing pants, not a skirt.
- This shows that Raccoon doesn't like getting wet.
- Red has a pet shark even though he's scared of sharks
- Pink is ticklish
- Pink has a fear of jellyfish
- Lord Tourettes was blushing because he didn't want Lady Tourettes to think he was obsessed with his hats.
- Broseph died again
- Fox was mentioned by both Red and Jess.
- Red's scared of sharks even if people are disguised as them. Although Red doesn't mind dressing up like a shark himself.