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|A Goddamn Interview|
|Season Special, Episode 1|
|Written by||MDKid663 and IONIX|
Spark Gets Lucky
Let's Have a Change
(Nicole walks into the interview room.)
Nicole: The hell is this microphone shit?
Interviewer: This is an interview with the NSFW Tales crew.
Nicole: Oh, great.
(Damon walks into the interview room)
Damon: I can't believe I'm doing this.
Interviewer: So Damon, how many times do you have sex per day?
Damon: Just once.
Interviewer: Your sex is one take?
Damon: Well I lived in hell for a pretty long time, I kinda have this huge crush on Alpha-Lonewolf's OC Let. You know, lust is a sin.
Interviewer: Okay, you're boring. Next!
(Damon slaps his forehead)
Damon: Jesus christ. (Shawn walks into the interview room)
Interviewer: Hey doggie-dick! How's sex out on the set?
Shawn: It's like bestiality except I'm half-breed.
Interviewer: So, how's Nicole working out for ya?
Shawn: Nicole? She's kinda a fine lady when you get to know her.
Interviewer: Nice! You're very gentlemanly.
Shawn: I know, I know. I get that lot, and I have a mature personality too.
Interviewer: Well, it's been nice seeing you. Next!
(The interviewer starts sweating.)
Interviewer: So Oboes, how's Spark going out for you?
Oboes: He's pretty cool! He's actually very nice. I had to fight Jess for him, and of course I won.
Spark: (off-screen) She's still my girlfriend you know!
Oboes: *sigh* I know! You're just my fuck-buddy!
Interviewer: And how does actress work out for you?
Oboes: It's kinda hard...they keep on putting me in slutty dresses, and sometimes it gets annoying.
Interviewer: I see, I see. And how are the sex scenes?
Oboes: Oh man, fucking amazing. I haven't had sex like what I had out there in YEARS.
Interviewer: And you're thinking about having it again?
Oboes: Hell yeah!
Interviewer: Of course, and how is Spark enjoying your uh- (looks at Oboes' breasts and blushes)
Spark: (off-screen) Hey Oboes! Is she looking at your boobs again!?
Oboes: Yeah. Can you come in here?
Spark: I'm on it (walks into the room)
(Spark smacks the interviewer)
Interviewer: What the fuck!?
Spark: You got distracted so I HAVE to do something.
Interviewer: I'm sorry! They're just so hypnotizing...anyway, Next!
(Retro comes in along with Georgia)
Interviewer: Hello you two! How's working with the NSFW Tales crew doing for ya?
Retro: It's pretty awesome actually, and I met some cool people also.
Interviewer: And you, Georgia? Georgia: It's pretty cool. I actually have boobs now, so that's a plus.
Retro: Yeah. (laughs nervously)
Interviewer: Do either of you feel nervous having sex with one another?
Retro: Well... Let's just say sometimes.
Georgia: I'm usually not that nervous. It's not like sex is something I haven't done before.
Retro: Yeah, It's true. Even though I spewed out blood when I got a blowjob for a long time.
Interviewer: Okay! That's enough, next!
(Retro stares at Georgia's breasts)
Georgia: You'll get 'em later.
(Eleven walks into the interview room) Eleven: ......
(Eleven walks off-screen, consuming people and walks back in his perfect form)
Eleven: So what do you wanna tell me?
Interviewer: So, how was Suzan?
Eleven: She's one sexy zombie lady I'll tell you that, I kinda feel stupid for exploding her though.
Interviewer: Oh, she's fine. Zombies can't actually die.
Eleven: Really? (thinks) Oh yeah. That's true.
Interviewer: Well, it's been nice having yo- (She looks out the window to see no more interviewees.) Interviewer: Oh yeah, you ate everybody.
Eleven: (shakes in rage) Still, I'm going to make Wolf pay for trapping me inside his hat.
Interviewer: Uh, okay...well, it's been fun interviewing you...you can leave now.
Eleven: Hold on, you didn't have Amy yet.
Interviewer: I thought you ate her!
(Amy slides out of Eleven's throat.)
Eleven: I didn't, she's over there. (points to Amy eating pizza)
Interviewer: Then...who the fuck was that?
Eleven: (spits out Amy) Sorry.
Amy: Dude, what do you eat?
(The other Amy turns into another Eleven, showing to be a clone)
Interviewer: What the fuck...
(She jumps out of her chair and walks out of the room.)
Interviewer: I'm done. Outie, bitches.
(She slams the door, locking Eleven in.)
(The Eleven's leave as Spark enters the room)
Spark: Fuck, Am I late?
Eleven: (realizes) What the fuck!?
Spark: So what's questions do I got?
Eleven: Okay...do you like Oboes?
Spark: Well, as a friend but I still love Jess.
Eleven: Okay...did you...enjoy having sex with all those fine women?
Spark: Fuck yeah! Even it was my dark form.
(Oboes climbs out of Eleven's throat.)
Oboes: We can do that anytime, baby.
(Oboes kicks down the door, as Spark and Oboes start making out, and leave the room.)
(Violet comes into the room)
Eleven: It's over. You can leave.
Eleven: Are we done here?
Mdkid663, ionixmusic: Yes, you can leave.
(He walks out the door, and shuts it behind him.)