Arachonobia Apocalypse
Air date TBA
Written by AndrewBrauer, YoshiRocker13, and Mdkid663
Directed by AndrewBrauer
Set in Daytime
Location City
Other episodes by the author

Trouble Within The Blink of an Eye

The Living Kamikaze

 A spider invasion hits the city, at first it simply tickles people, but then it turns into monsters that want to eat. Rapper and a couple others hope to survive and find a way to stop this.




(The Intro shows off what the spiders do, as it then shows a random couple was sitting on a park bench enjoying their day)

Boy: What a lovely day honey.

Girl: And nothing can ruin this day.

(Suddenly a little black spider shows up crawling on the Girl's shoulder)

Girl: Oh! (giggles) that tickles.

Boy: What? (notices the Spider) Hey! Scram! (slaps the spider off her shoulder)

(Then a group of spiders show up in front of them)

Boy: Holy shit!

Girl: (screams) Get them away from me!

(Four spiders crawl up each of their legs, tickling them)

Girl: (laughs hysterically) Pl-Ple-Please stop it!

Boy: (laughs also) Get th-these bu-bugs away from me!

(Suddenly they start to bite them)

Girl: Ow!

Boy: FUCK!

(Blood drips out of the girl's leg, which attracts a larger group of spider that crawl up their legs)

Girl: (screams) STOP!!


(The spiders crawl all other their bodies and it ends with thousands of spiders covering their bodies completely)

Girl: Guess this is our end?!


(Cuts to Ball Busters as it shows Simon drinking at the bar, and Alice rushes in)

Alice: Simon! Turn on the news!

Simon: What's up!? (Turns on the tv to a news reporter outside)

Female News Reporter: Apparently a swarm of spiders has invaded the city, be warned to stay indoors and out of areas with any form of environment.

Bitchess: (behind the reporter) Look now bitch, looks like you didn't follow the poor rules. (runs off)

Simon: That sounds like fucking bullshit!

Alice: Well, we may be in danger! We got to go!

(Then a huge swarm of spiders suddenly come inside)

Simon: Shit! It's true!

(As they are about to be attacked, shotgun blasts are heard and the spiders are splattered by the shotgun, the person using the shotgun is none other than Rapper)

Rapper: Scram ya' buggers! (blasts more spiders)

Alice: (To Rapper) Who the hell are you!?

Rapper: I'm the guy who just saved your fucking ass bitch. (shoots more spiders)

Simon: No time for questions let's get out of here!

(They leave Ball Busters as they run into Emma outside)

Emma: What's up bitches! (Points to Rapper) Who's this guy?

Rapper: Dear vagina sack, my name is Rapper. And I just saved your friends' asses from spiders.

Emma: Spiders? (Turns around and a spider is crawling up her back) What spiders?

(Simon flicks the spider off her back)

Alice: Well, we got to find a safe place to hide!

Professor Stick: Old chaps! In here! (points to his lab)

(Simon, Alice, Rapper, and Emma run inside the lab to where Professor Stick is, Professor Stick locks the door and puts a force field around the lab)

Professor Stick: Alright, we should be safe.

Rapper: Nice one Professor Dick.

Simon: Who are you man?

Professor Stick: Dear boy, I am Professor Stick, known for best inventions and best scientist in America.

Rapper: And best nickname Professor Dick. (laughs)

Professor Stick: SILENCE!

(A large portal appears as a lavender android comes out, none other than Nyzona-04)

Nyzona: Professor Stick, I sense a disturbance in the future.

Alice: (Points at the table with Pink giggling with spiders on her) What is that over there?

Professor Stick: GOODNESS! (zaps Pink, causing the spiders to get off her)

Pink: Huh?!

Professor Stick: In here! QUICK!

(Pink runs in the lab)

Pink: (pants) What the fuck is going on out there?!

Emma: The fucking invasion of the spiders!

Alice: (To Pink) Where's your husband Blue and his friend Red?

Pink: Holy shit! BLUE! BLINK!

(cuts to Blink at school with Ellen)

Ellen: Nice ice cream.

Blink: I love it!

(Suddenly a huge swarm of spiders invade the school)

Blink: (screams) SPIDERS!

Ellen: HELP!

(suddenly, the two disappear and appear in Professor Stick's lab)

Pink: Oh thank god!

Professor Stick: That worked.

Blink: What's going on?!

Nyzona-04: A spider invasion.

Alice: What about Red and Blue? Where are they?

(suddenly, the two are teleported in the lab)

Red: Whoa! Cool shit!

Blue: Sp- Spiders... Everywhere…

Emma: Okay, can someone fill me in on what the fuck is going on?

Alice: Emma, there are children!

(Nyzona-04 slaps her forehead)

Emma: Sorry, I thought they were little people.

(Alice faceplams, as Eleven sees Emma in Professor Stick's lab)

Rapper: Your a retard.


Rapper: Don't start.

(Suddenly Eleven teleports inside and grabs Emma, the two then teleport somewhere else)

Simon: EMMA!!

(Bitchess and Flame were in another room in the lab)

Bitchess: What's the big deal? Their just puny spiders.

Flame: (angered) Will you stop being a bitch…?!

Alice: That weirdo who makes girls breasts bigger took Emma!

(Ryle punches through a wall and comes in the lab)


Flame: (from the room) IS THAT THE BROWN SHIT I HATE!?!

Simon: Get those two out of here, otherwise those two will start world war three!

Professor Stick: Is he always like this?

Rapper: Worse.

Alice: (To Simon) We got to rescue Emma, who knows what that guy will do to Emma.

Blue: But there's man eating spiders out there! We could get killed!

Simon: Oh please, me and Alice have faced worse.

Alice: (To Simon) No we haven't you jackass.

Simon: I know. (Points to Ryle and Flame) But those two could burn this whole place down.

Professor Stick: This whole place is made of metal, it won't burn, trust me.

Nyzona-04: (To Simon) Are you implying that these two are the problem?

Simon: (To Nyzona-04) How could I point it out even less.

Bitchess: Eesh, those two must be on their periods.

Ryle: Bitch, shut the fuck up! (punches Bitches several times)

Alice: Well we got to go save her. (To Simon) She is your sister.

Bitchess: (rubs herself) Yeah, you seem to be on a period you fucking semen faced bitch.

Simon: (Notices Ryle) Anything to get us out of here. But us two can't do it on our own.

Ryle: (grabs Bitchess by the neck) You do you mean?

Bitchess: You have no fucking idea what that even means? Wow, you must be a real no brainer fuck face.

(Flame laughs in the background as Ryle becomes very enraged)


Nyzona-04: (to Flame while reamaining silent) Why are you even laughing right now?

(Ryle throws Bitchess at Flame)

Ryle: Just like you did when you got annoyed by Fifi.

Professor Stick: Chaps! Use these! (gives them guns) They'll put a shield over you! You'll be safe.

Alice: (To Simon) Well, who else is going to come with us?

(Purple laser are disintegrating the spiders out of nowhere)

Alice: Was that Violet?

(Violet is banging at the force field)

Simon: Someone let that bitch in!

Violet: Hello! Is anyone there!?

Alice: We're safe, there are plenty of people here!

Red: Cool! Another hot bitch to fuck!

Blue: Really Red?

Alice: (To Red) Shut up you stupid dick.

Red: Stupidly AWESOME dick!

Blue: (slaps Red across the head) Shut UP!

(Violet slaps Red across the face as Ryle punches him afterward)

Simon: We need some people to come with us to go get Emma, who wants to come?

Violet: I would.

Alice: (To Rapper) Rapper, what about you?

Rapper: You bitches are nothing without me, so I'll come too.

Professor Stick: You kids be careful! There's more than 10,000 spiders out there now!

Simon: We'll be fine.

Alice: (Gulps) Hopefully. (Simon, Alice, Violet, and Rapper go outside)

Nyzona-04: I'll stay with Professor Stick to protect the lab.

Simon: (To Alice, Violet, and Rapper) So where do you think they are? (They suddenly hear screams on top of a near by warehouse)

Alice: That's them!

(Suddenly several groups of spiders show up in front of them)

Rapper: Well well, if it ain't Spider-Man's ugly little babies. (laughs and pulls a shotgun out)

Violet: (to Rapper) Now It's the good time give some weapons!

Simon: Time to shoot some shit up! (Uses shield weapons and starts shooting at the spiders)

Rapper: You pussies seem hopeless without them. (throws out a couple of weapons)

Alice: Typical sociopath behavior. (Grabs the two barrel shotgun and shoots several spiders)

(Rapper shoots at the ground to create a small shockwave sending most of the spiders into walls, killing them)

Rapper: This is much better than squishing them.

(Violet glows her left eye and grabs an Uzi and katana, she glows her katana purple and slices the spiders, They all start shooting their way through several spiders on the street, as they make their way into the warehouse rooftop and find Eleven humping Emma)

Simon & Alice: What the fuck!?

Emma: What? His dick is very large!

Rapper: So large even a retard would have.

Alice: Okay, I hate to interrupt your little pleasure time with him, but we got to go.

Emma: Okay fine. (Gets up)

(Violet slaps her forehead, where suddenly the rooftop crumbles and everyone falls inside the warehouse, and find a giant boss size spider)

Emma: (Shocked) Fuck!!

Rapper: Now that's one big hairy monster.

Violet: I'm gonna enjoy this.

Emma: Well not only does this guy… (Points at Eleven) fuck hard, but he kills even harder, right?

(Eleven fires unstable beams at the giant spider, Rapper flips over the Spider and throws a couple of swords, stabbing the Spider's back, Rapper jumps behind a large amount of boxes, Eleven spews out many flashbang and smoke grenades, making it unable to see anything and blinded)

Emma: That was awesome! (Suddenly a huge swarm of spiders comes in and corners everyone)

Alice: (Nervous) We're fucked!

Rapper: Alright! My favourite part of the game!

(Rapper gets a large rocket launcher out and fires it at the ground, sending every single small spider out the warehouse, Emma suddenly gets grabbed by one of the arms of the giant spider, Raccoon flies in and chops the giant spider's arm off with his sword of destiny, releasing Emma)

Simon: Perfect time for someone new to come in!

Alice: But the spider is still alive!

Raccoon: (points his sword to the Giant Spider) Now I wirr send you to spider herr!

Emma: (Starts to go towards the door) Let's get the fuck out of here! (She opens the door and a swarm of spiders jump on Emma tickling her)

Simon & Alice: NO!!!!!!!

Rapper: Oh snap! Did not expect THAT!

Emma: (Being tickled) I'm fucking dying and it feels great! (Laughs a few times)

(Emma body gets dragged away by the spiders, as it then cuts back to the raccoon, as the Raccoon throws the sword into the Spider's mouth, choking it)

Simon: Shit, that thing looks like it's going to explode! (The giant spider explodes and leaves everyone with purple goop everywhere)

Rapper: Hah hah! I LOVE this kinda gore!

(Violet facepalms)

Alice: Well, Emma's gone, and by the looks of it, there will be an even bigger body count by the end of all this.

Simon: Wonder who will die next?

Raccoon: There is stirr more spiders-a to dear with.

Alice: Let's head back to the lab, maybe they are all still safe in there?

Simon: Let's find out.

(Cuts to Spark in his house killing a giant spider with his katana)

Spark: God dammit! DIE ALREADY!!!

(Spark sees them and follows them, They all arrive back in Professor Stick's lab)

Professor Stick: Oh thank goodness your safe.

Alice: Well Emma's dead, and we have no idea how to get rid of all these spiders.

Simon: For a genius like you, I'm surprised you haven't learned about these spiders.

Professor Stick: Well I'm currently searching for resources about these Spiders, it seems they must come from some sort of power to devour people.

Alice: What kind of power?

Professor Stick: Aha! These Spiders appear to come from some different dimension! That would explain why these Spiders devour people.

Simon: No shit!

Ryle: Hey! Professor Dick!

Professor Stick: What?

Ryle: (while fighting the spiders) Hey! Can you be a good friend and create a cyborg suit here!?

Professor Stick: (sighs) Alright, but stop being so rude!

(PF gets his Cyborg Suit out for Ryle)

Ryle: Do you have these Cyber Power Sword? (activates his suit)

Flame: YEAH!

Blue: Flame, don't start.

Alice: Maybe the rest of us can go get help? Right? (points to Red, Blue, Rapper, and Bitchess)

Bitchess: Pfft, Puh-lease! I'm not goin' out there.

Red: Bitch.

Simon: Well, I can tell who's going to die next? (Points to Bitchess who slaps a spider away from her shoulder)

Bitchess: Get away from me you pathetic insect!

Professor Stick: A spider is not an insect! It's an arachnid!

Bitchess: WHATEVER!

(Bitchess suddenly falls through the floor and into a room full of spiders that swarm onto her)

Simon: Told you! I'm great at this game!

Bitchess: Oh shit.

Ryle: Serves the bitch right, have fun in hell!

Bitchess: SHUT UP! You pathetic lame existence of life!

Flame: Ho-ho! BURN!

(Several spiders latch onto Bitchess tickling her to death)

Bitchess: You stupid spiders! I'm not ticklish!

Ryle: (ignores) Whatever! (punches Flame through a wall) That's why you killed by the wolf dick!

(Everyone ignores Bitchess as she dies in the hole, Professor Stick patches up the hole)

Violet: Serves her right, I hope she has fun in hell.

Bitchess: Shut up you bitch!

Alice: Wait Spark, where's Jess?

Simon: She's probably trapped in her apartment, we got to go get her.

(Cuts to Jess having a nap in her bed, It shows Spiders starting to swarm Jess's apartment while she's asleep)

Alice: We don't know how much time we have before the spiders take her, Emma and Bitchess are gone, what about her?

Simon: She's right, we better get her Spark.

(Cuts to Spark who kicks down Jess' door in the living room with a sword)

Simon: (Behind him) That was quick, let's find her.

(A few spiders begin climbing up the end of Jess' bed and into her blanket.)

Alice: (Notices) Oh shit, Spark I found her.

Spark: Hope I'm not too late. (runs up to Jess' bedroom)

(Jess giggles after waking up.)

Jess: Spark? (rubs her eye) Is that you tickling my feet?

(More spiders start to crawl on her face and body)

Jess: (screams) HELP!

Spark: Uh. (gives Jess a mirror)

Jess: (screams) GET THESE OFF ME!

(Spark slashes the spiders off of Jess, Jess flicks some off, but more and more keep latching onto her)


(A spider bites her neck)

Jess: OW!

Alice: Spark, I don't think we can do anything now. If we keep messing with the spiders, they'll keep latching onto her!

(Suddenly a green shield surrounds Jess, knocking all the spiders off her.)

Jess: Huh?!

(Professor Stick is seen outside.)

PF: Yes! The shield works!

Simon: Awesome! Professor Dick to the rescue, let's get her out of here!

(Spark grabs Jess as the rest head back to Prof. Stick's lab)

Alice: We're back!

Spark: I wonder if the others are okay.

Jess: (cries) What were the spiders about?!

(The lab is shown swarmed with spiders and everybody seems to have left)

Professor Stick: GOOD GRIEF! My entire lab is infested with Spiders!

Alice: This invasion is getting stronger.

Simon: Holy Shit!

Spark: This is not good.

Alice: Okay, I think our next plan is to get out of the city, maybe the military is around and we can get out of here.

Simon: (To Alice) Sounds like a plan, since it's just you, me, Spark, Jess, and Professor Stick.

Professor Stick: I say this apocalypse is getting intense…

(A helicopter flies overhead them in the direction of the other side of the city)

Alice: Let's follow where the helicopter is going, maybe there's help over on the other side of the city.

(They start walking through the city and see no spiders so far)

Simon: Can you believe this just happened out of nowhere?

(A demon flies to the helicopter)

Alice: What was that!?

(The demon attaches itself to the helicopter as it flies deep into the city)

Demon: ..... (Sees the others)

Alice: (To Professor Stick) What do you think it wants?

Professor Stick: (investigates) This is insane…

Simon: Maybe we should find ourselves something to drive in to get us there faster.

(The demon flies to the group)

Simon: Shit!

(The demon turns into a black figure with red eyes None other than Damon)

Alice: (Notices many spiders are coming up behind them) Uh, guys?

Damon: ...... (summons a demon to get rid of the spiders)

Alice: (To Spark) You know him?

Spark: I kinda summoned him and tried to kill me for that.

Simon: Well he saved us from those spiders.

(A bus suddenly shows up, and they all get in)

Alice: Who's the driver?

Professor Stick: Chaps, you don't just walk right into a bus. How do you know if you can even trust this?

(Suddenly many giant spiders latch onto the outside of the bus with everyone inside getting surprised by it)

Alice: Well now we're not leaving.

Professor Stick: See?

(Suddenly Bruce bangs on the bus door.)

Jess: OH GOD!


Alice: Should we let him in?

Simon: What if he's been bitten, he could be infected.


Alice: Let's just let him on. (Opens the door to let Bruce in)

Bruce: Oh thank god!

Jess: ...BRUCE?!

Bruce: Wha-?! I remember you!

Spark: You know him!?

Jess: Yes! This is the man I used to hang out with! He was my Ex-Boyfriend! Until I saw him with some purple bitch!

Everyone: Fifi you mean?

(Simon thinks about something)

Simon: Wait a minute! (Points at Damon) That's the asshole who shot my legs!

Jess: YES! Whatever!

Bruce: And boy am I much happier with her...

Simon: Where do we go?

(The bus just drives straight through the city)

(A brown man is driving the bus)

Alice: Who is he?

Brown Man: The guy driving the bus.

Simon: So what are you some nameless prick?

Brown Man: It's Vinny (whispers) You jackass.

(Jess feels pain in here neck from the spider bite earlier in her bedroom)

Alice: (To Jess) Are you okay?

Jess: I feel kinda funny.

Bruce: SHE'S INFECTED! (pulls a sword out) Then we kill her...

Alice: No way! Maybe if we continue driving there could be a doctor at the other side of the city.



  • One of the rare episodes where not everyone lives. So far Emma and Bitchess have died.


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