|Season 1, Episode 1|
- Auto-Tune Bee
(The episode opens with the bee flying in front of the MaulMart.)
Auto-Tune Bee: Season Omega, Motherfucker!
(Cut to Red and Blue hanging out in the apartment.)
Red: Uuuuuugh, I'm bored as fuck!
Blue: Calm down dude, that sleeping medicine will start taking affect in about...
(Shows clock ticking at an incredibly slow pace.)
Blue: 30 minutes.
Red: (groans) That's too looooooong!
Blue (in head): Just like my dick.
Blue's crotch: Bro. Not cool.
(Door rings as Blue is cutting vegetables. Blue walks over to the door and opens it.)
Stacy: Sup, Bitch. Where's Red?
Blue: Uh, Red is...
(Cut to Red spasming in his bedroom, back to Blue.)
Blue: Fine. Nothing to worry about.
Stacy: Whatever. Call me when he has a boner.
(Blue slowly closes the door.)
Blue: Red... Do you have a boner? Not to sound gay or anything...
(Red jumps on Blue, stoned.)
Red: Haha! Dude! I'm rock hard. For...that knife. (Red takes the knife.)
Red: So shiny...(Stabs himself in the face, blood spurting everywhere.)
Blue: Dude what the hell?! That was the last clean knife!!
Red: HAHHAHAHAHA! (Goes quiet.) Hey... could I have an ounce?
Blue: Dude. You need help.
(Cut to the LEZ building with a "Blues Only" sign.)
Lesbian: Hey girls, let's play spin the bottle!
All lesbians: YEAH!
(Pan to the door slamming open, revealing another Blue.)
Blue2: Sup lesbianas. Who's ready to ponerte manos a la?
(All the lesbians cheer and start making out with Blue2. Cut to Red looking out a window.)
Red (holding binoculars, stoned): Dude, I think why are you over there?
Blue: What? (Red hands the binoculars to Blue) Oh my god! We need to get to that building!
Red: But I cant go! It says Blues Only.
Blue: Oh. Sorry man, but your gonna have to sit this one out!
Red: Okay whatevs.
(Cut to Blue running towards the building, busting the doors open)
Lesbian: Hey, look! It's another bl-(Blue puts his hand on her mouth.)
Blue: Hey, douche! There's only room for one blue guy in this town and thats me!
Blue2: O RLY? Well, thats suprising. Considering that I'm actually...
(He zips down a zipper to reveal that he's...)
Lesbians and Blue: *GAAAASP*!
Broseph: Oh yeah, bro. Check my poison-filled kunai that I'm going to kill you with. Pretty cool, huh?
Lesbian(whispering to Blue): Psst! Here's a giant dildo.
Blue: Why do I need a dild-( Sword come out of the tip, silence.) Oh.
Broseph: Haha! Do you like to play with dicks, Blue? I bet you do! HAHHHAHH-
(Blue cuts him in half with one slice, exposing his entrails.)
Lesbians: Yay! Dinner party, woo!
(Red slams the door open.)
Red: Who's ready to PAR-TAY?
Lesbian: Dude, this is an all blue party.
Red: Not a problem! (Red takes some blue spray paint and sprays himself, proceeding to make out with the lesbians.)
Blue: Okay then. (Cuts to outside the building to show a liquid coming out the doorway, forming a body.)
Ghost Broseph: Dundun-Dun-Dundun. Dundun-Dun-Dundun. DUNDUN-DUN-DUNDUN.