Comicazi Con
Air date 02-15-14
Written by Alpha-Lonewolf
Directed by Alpha-Lonewolf
Location Comic Convention
Other episodes by the author

If Dick Figures Episodes Were Real

Dick Figures Show 2



Red and Wolf attend an alien event at the comic con but then believe aliens may walk upon them


Deep Voice: (Narration) It was at a comic con where people came in costumes and nerd outfits to unleash how much of a loser they really are. I can smell the body oder from here. Urg! I'm going to puke!

Broseph: (In a He-man costume next to a girl) You want me to show you my power? (gets slapped in the face)

Lord Tourettes: (in the unicorn comic section) It's a wonderland of

Deep Voice: (Narration) It is here where to brave morons fuck everything up... this is going to be tight.

(Red, Blue, And Wolf were walking into a comic con passing Mr. Dingleberry in a security outfit)

Blue: Finally, I get to be with my kind of people!

Red: You mean the nerd kind?

Blue: Shut up we prefer to be called hackers.

Wolf: Or just plain hacks

Blue: Yeah what Wolf sa... HEY!

(Red and Wolf start laughing)

Blue: Fuck you guys. I'm going to the super hero section.

Red: Have fun with your nerd friends geek face.

Wolf: I want to go check out the weapons from comic books

Red: I want to go check out the slutty costumes

(A man come out of some doors witha sign)

Man: The Alien Comic Event is now open!

Wolf and Red: Aw shit yeah!

Cue Card: After the event

(Wolf and Red come out looking nervous)

Wolf: Did you see all those scenarios about how aliens take over the human race?

Red: They were in disguise just like real people.

Wolf: you mean like all these people?

(it shows different people in weird costumes like Spock, Terminator, Predator, and then shows Stacy's sister)

Red: they could be anyone of them.

Wolf: This is the perfect cover for them to not even try to look human.

(they see a alien costume pass by)

Wolf and Red: Nah!

Wolf: I'm sure we are just paranoid

(Shows The Beebs across the room from them as a dramatic "Dun Dun DUN!" sound plays)

Red: and Wolf: (wide eyed) Holy shit we're doomed.

Red: What do we do?

Wolf: If we're real quiet and lay low, we can sneak out of the place without being noticed.

Red: Right.

(Wolf and Red begin to slowly walk to the exit until someone grabs Red)

Red: AUGH! (turns and punches Blue)

Blue: AUGH! You asshole! What was that for? I was going to show you this new computer i got...

(Red and Wolf slap the computer out of Blue's hands and start stomping and smashing it with trash cans)


Wolf: (closes Blue's mouth) SHH!! That was a device to spy on us. you should be thankful we did that,

Blue: Oh shit. Are we being hunted by a agency again?

Red: Even worse.

Blue: What is worse than that?

Wolf and Red: Alien invaders.

Blue: (Glares) Really? You idiots never cease to out do yourselves.

Red: (puts a large piece of tape over Blue's mouth) you'll thank us later.

(Wolf and Red start to walk to the exit until a hot girl in an avatar costume come up to them)

Girl: Hey there. You want to have some alien sex in the girls restroom.

Red: Oh shit they found us!

Wolf: You won't be laying eggs in me alien scum! (uses Blue as a weapon to beat the girl with)

(A girl starts to scream)

Wolf: They are using their brain scrambling vocals to frie our brains!

Red: I'll get her! (shoots her head off with a shotgun)

(People start to run around in panic)

Blue: (Wakes up after being knocked out) What the fuck? What did you guys do!?

Red: The aliens know we know about them! We have to kill them!

Blue:You can't start killing all these people!

Red: Your right. How can we tell the aliens from the people?

Wolf: (pulls out a minigun) Fuck the people, we have to save then human race!

Red: Your right! (Gets a Flamethrower from Wolf) Free Burn!

(Wolf and Red starts to burn and shoot anyone they see. outside it shows the convention burning. people try to run for the


Blue: Well at least some people will live.

Red: Oh no! they are excaping!

Wolf: Not if I can help it. (pulls out a phone and makes a call)

(when the people start to run out of the convention they are gunned down by men in bio suits)

Bio suit soldier: Do not attempt to flee aliens! We got the place surrounded!

Blue: What did you do Wolf?!

Wolf: I called area 51 and told them aliens were passing themselves off as cotumes fans at a comic con.

Red: Smart.

Blue:You morons! How are we going to get out of here!?

Wolf: It is a small price to pay to keep the aliens at bay.

Red: We're going to be heros!

Blue: Actually we're going to be dead

(They see a missile heading towards the convention)

Bio suit soldier: Prepare to die alien scum! say hello to Satan for us.

Blue: We're going to die!

Red: At least we'll die like dicks.

Blue: you know I can't agree with you more on that.

Wolf: Fuck death! I want the fame!

(Pulls Red and Blue along with himself in his hat to hide. Mr. Dingleberry stands out in the open watching the missile come closer)

Mr. Dingleberry: Eh, well this is typical.

(the whole place explodes nad Wolfs hat flies off with the explosion and lands back at his cabin)

Wolf: (Come out of his hat) Woo! we did it! We saved the world!

(from inside Wolf's hat)

Blue: Where am I!? How do we get out!?

Red: I'm floating in space! Woo!

Wolf: Oops sorry. (shakes them out of his hat)

Blue: Don't ever do that again.

Red: Who are you gonna call? Alien Busters!



  • 1/5 Unicorn Barf!
  • 2/5 It was like Meh.
  • 3/5 I guess it was... pretty good.
  • 4/5 This is like crazy right?

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