|Derek Strikes Back|
|Season 1, Episode 6|
Small Penis Advantages
Derek Makes a Return
(Our adventure begins with Derek at the MaulMart.)
Cashier: Okay, that will be $99.78.
Derek: Alright, here's my credit card.
Cashier: Thank you. (leaves.)
Derek: Wow. I'm a retard.
(Outside of store.)
Derek: Okay, bacon, chocolate, beans, monkey heads, mac and che-
Suzanleebeel: Hi, Derek!
Derek: Oh, Hi Suzan.
Suzan: How much did that stuff cost you?
Derek: My entire credit card.
Suzan: Ouch. What have you been up to?
Derek: Not much. I just woke up.
Suzan: Oh. Well, sorry for bothering you.
Derek: Don't worry about it. I got to get home before these things get warm.
Suzan: Wait. I have something to tell you.
Suzan(whispering): Did you murder Sylvia?
Suzan(whispering): And...your an assassin, right?
Suzan: Come to my place. I have some people waiting to meet you.
Derek: Alright then.
(10 Minutes Later...)
Suzan: Derek, I would like to introduce you to the league known as V.A.G.I.N.A.S.
Derek: Vaginas? Really? That seems a bit childish.
Suzan: Well I didn't make it up. Anyway our league is made up of 7 people.
Suzan: Violet, Amy, Georgia, Ianthe, Nicole, Absinthe, and of course, Suzanleebeel.
Derek: Your name sticks out like a sore thumb, you know that right?
Suzan: Well, you don't have to say the "leebeel" part if you don't want to.
Derek: Okay then. So why do you want me here?
Suzan: I wanted you here to tell you that there actually is a divison of VAGINAS for boys.
Derek: Let me guess. It's called D.I.C.K.S.
Suzan: Yup! Let me introduce you to the members.
Suzan: Issac, Cameron, Kaleb and Samuel.
Suzan: We don't have a "D" person to fill in the name, so I got you!
Derek: Well, you needed the D, and you got it!
Suzan: Anyway your first mission is to track down a loose criminal that just recently robbed a bank.
Samuel: Robbing banks? Really?
Issac: Dude. The police can handle that. We're professional assassins.
Kaleb: Why not give us something exciting to do or kill?
Suzan: Okay, fine. Go steal a Pepsi truck, and bring the contents back here.
D.I.C.K.S Members: ALRIGHT!
DICKS: We'll be right back!
(They all leave.)
Nicole: Won't they get into trouble?
Suzan: Oh yeah. But thats all part of the plan...Hehehe...
(DICKS slam open the door.)
Issac: We're back!
Derek: And we brought Pepsi!
Samuel: Superior soda!
Cameron: WOO! HOUSE PARTY!
(They drink sodas and light up blunts.)
Derek(stoned): Bro, Suzan. You gotta try...this.
Suzan: Sorry, I don't smoke crack.
Derek(stoned): Whaeva! Yo missin out...Partay boyeees!
DICKS: Aww yeaaaah!
Suzan: This is gonna take a while.