|Air date||August 3, 2012|
|Other episodes by the author|
Le Chat Noir
Did you know Blue had a girlfriend before Stacy? No? Well then you're about to find out how Blue's first relationship ended.
(Many people are shown rushing into Red and Blue's apartment, where there are flashing lights coming from inside.)
(At the snack table, Red is floating in mid-air again, but he has a microphone in his hands. Blue is standing next to him, covering his ears.)
Red: Woo! (voice raises) This is gonna be the best party ever!
Blue: Dude, this music is going to make my ears bleed!
Red: Who cares, bitch?
Blue: Could you at least lower the volume a little bit? I got a call from my girlfriend earlier saying she is coming over and I don't know why.
Red: Oh shit, son. You in for it now
Red: Dude, everybody knows if your girl wants to come over and not for a date, that obviously means she wants to have (close up of his face and speaks with a deep voice) a talk.
Blue: You mean...she is gonna dump me?
Red: Pfft, duh. What else would I mean?
(The doorbell rings.)
Blue: Oh crap! That's probably her. (runs to the door)
(Red stops floating and downs a bottle of beer. Maroon walks up to him while waving his arms around.)
Maroon: Yo yo, Red-dy! Sick party, man!
Red: Maroon! What's up, dude?
Red: (eyes widen at his last sentence) ...What?!
Maroon: I said I became friends with a box! He is the most awesome box EVER! (as fear grows in Red's eyes) He can do almost anything and he too knows how to party! I'm surprised you didn't invite him o—
(Red breaks his beer bottle and stabs Maroon's forehead before he could finish his sentence. Maroon stares at the bottle in shock. After an awkward silence, Maroon falls to the floor dead.)
(Red's frightened face is shown in high detail as a creepy music plays.)
Red: The "insane demons" will no longer harm you.
(The music goes back to normal and Blue opens the door. He is surprised to see more invited guests rushing into the apartment. He moves away from the door so he wouldn't get trampled. When all of the guests are inside, there is a light blue girl waiting at the door, but Blue doesn't notice her.)
Blue: (sighs) Looks like I got worried for nothi— (notices the girl)
Girl: Uhh, hey...
Blue: O-Oh, uhh, hi. Y-You look, uhh, r-really pretty tonight.
Girl: Thanks... Listen, Blue, we need to talk.
Blue: Yeah. I kinda figured. (moves out of the doorway to let her in) Come right inside.
(Camera goes to Blue's crotch.)
Blue's crotch: Noooooo...
(Meanwhile, Red throws Maroon's corpse out of the window. The body lands right into the dumpster and the lid closes. Inside the dumpster, next to Maroon's head, is a kitten Kitty Amazing.)
(Blue and his girlfriend are standing next to another window with wine glasses in their hands.)
Blue: Okay, admit it. You're breaking up with me.
Girlfriend: Well…I’ll be honest here. It’s not you or me. (sounding a little angry) It’s my mom…
Blue: Your mom? Why?
Girlfriend: Well, a week ago, I got a phone call from the hospital of the town she lives in saying she got into a serious car accident. The doctor says that she will recover, but she is gonna need some help around her home. And since that my dad is dead and my mom and aunts hate each others guts, I seem to be the only family member she can rely on.
Blue: (a little bored) Oookaaayy…
Girlfriend: …Aaannd…the town she lives in is, like, three hours away from here. I’ll probably be too busy helping my mom out that I couldn’t possibly just leave the house to go out with you. So, this is pretty much a forced break-up… I’m sorry.
Blue: (yawns) When will you be leaving?
Girlfriend: In about a week. I just started packing my clothes before I came here.
Blue: Okay? So…will I ever see—?
(A drunk Red runs to them and carelessly shoves the girlfriend out the window. She screams as she falls to the ground. A *SPLAT* sound is heard and her screaming stops.)
Red: Hey Bluu-hu-hu-hue… You’ve got to see what is over there…
Blue: (calls out to the window as Red drags him away from there) Charlotte! Nooooo!
(ABOUT FOUR YEARS LATER)
Charlotte: (bored) Aaaand that's how I forcibly broke up with him.
Wednesday: Wow. Good to know you weren't always a bitch.
Charlotte: Hey! Gimme a good reason how I'm a bitch now.
Indigo: Well, uhhh, you are kind of mean to Pink. Plus remember Charlotte, there's plenty of fish in the sea.
Wednesday: Mean to Pink? She wants to kill her, Indigo. Everyone knows it. (to Charlotte) I'm surprised you haven't been put in prison yet.
Charlotte: That's because I haven't killed her yet, you goth c—