|If Dick Figures Had Color|
|Air date||February 23, 2014.|
|Written by||YoshiRocker13, Ionixmusic, Mdkid663|
|Other episodes by the author|
Tikia's Visit to America
Dick Figures has mostly had grey backgrounds and non-colored characters right? Well that's about to change. When Red presses a mysterious red button, the whole world turns colorful, let's see how our DF characters can live with it.
- Red (later Batman)
- Blue (later Bloser)
- Earl Grey
- Gerald Butler
- Lord Tourettes
- Oboes Bi
- Lady Tourettes
- Damon (cameo)
- Professor Stick (mentioned)
(Red, Blue, Rapper, Ryle, Spark were in a bar, Oboes walks in to find Spark)
Red: Bros, bros, we should go at that SWEEEET party with booze and boobs.
Blue: (face palms) Not this time Red.
Spark: (blushes)' Umm, hey Oboes
Rapper: (notices Spark's blush) Don't go cheatin' on Jess. (laughs)
Oboes: Trust me Rapper, we're not dating,
Spark: (snaps) Yeah Rap.
Blue: Oh god Red, not again!
(Red stares at Oboes' boobs)
Ryle: (face palms) Every fucking time...
Oboes: Excuse me, sir. Can you stop looking at my breasts?
Blue: Come on dude, away from the girl's breasts?
Red: (grumbles) Hey what's that!? (notices a red button)
Blue: Red! Don't touch that! Haven't you heard of DON'T push the red button!?
Ryle: Yeah dumbass.
Red: Shut your whore mouth! Do I see a sign that says that?
Blue: Uhh, n-
Red: Well then it's okay!
(as soon as Red presses the button, it starts to shine brightly causing everyone to shield their eyes)
Oboes: Red, you fucking idiot!
Damon: I knew this was gonna happen.
(the shine makes the screen go white, seconds later Red wakes up)
Red: Ow, my head... (looks around) What the fuck happened here?
Oboes: Why are my boobs pink now?
Red: What the?! (long gasp) What happened to me!?
Ryle: Why the fuck is my hair black!?
Blue: My whole face is blue! RED!
Red: What!? SHIIIT! Oboes your boobs look more sexy with pink! (touches her boobs and snuggles against them)
Oboes: HEY! (She swings her leg across his back, and smacks him to the ground.) No one touches my boobs without my permission!
Red: Still worth it.
(Oboes disappears into a cloud of smoke.)
Blue: Red! You made this problem now YOU have to fix it!
Red: Alright alright! (presses the red button again but nothing happens) Nope.
(Damon pulls out his desert eagle and shoots Red in the knee and leg)
Red: WHAT THE FUCKING BALLS WAS THAT FOR!?!
Damon: For doing something completely stupid.
Blue: But how are we going to fix it?
Computer from Button: Color will reset to normal in, 24 Hours.
Ryle: You have to be fucking kidding.
Blue: Well at least it's only one day.
Ryle: (sighs) Fine.
(Blue walks home)
Pink: Blue? What's going on!? Why is everything so colourful?
Blink: What's color?:
Blue: (sighs) Long story guys. But we have to stay like this for 24 hours.
(Jess was in the park)
Jess: Why is everything so colourful?
Spark: (walking at the park) At least Jess isn't seeing this.
Spark: (quietly) I stand corrected.
Jess: Spark! May I ask why everything is so colourful!? My head and hair is coloured in and so is the rest of the world!
Spark: (sighs) Your not gonna like this.
(1 MINUTE LATER)
Spark: I know, retarded isn't it.
Jess: Well, I guess it isn't THAT bad...
Spark: Yeah, your right.
(shows Lord Tourettes jumping around in joy)
Lord Tourettes: It's so FUCKING beautiful! I could just FUCK with it all day!
Lady Tourettes: (confused) What?
Lord Tourettes: Oh, Uhh, color is so FUCKING beautiful! How did this happen?
Lady Tourettes: No and I don't FUCKING want to know.
Lord Tourettes: Okay FUCK FACE!!!
Lady Tourettes: (sighs and walks away)
(shows Broseph with a grey face)
Broseph: Aw come on bro!? No color for me?
Girl #1: Uncool dude.
Girl #2: Yeah, let's go. (walks away)
Earl Grey: (horrified) WHAT IS THIS!?!
Gerald Butler: (sighs) What is it now master?
Earl Grey: EVERYTHING IS MADE OF COLOR!?! THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!!!
Gerald Butler: Oh relax sir it's just col-
(Earl Grey points his sword to Gerald Butler)
Earl Grey: DON'T START WITH THAT AGAIN!
Gerald Butler: (face palms) For fuck sake Earl...
(Earl Grey flies above the city)
Earl Grey: No matter, I'll STILL go with my plan to turn everything black and white! (begins throwing bombs across the city)
(back with Red and Blue)
Red: (dancing with girls) This is more sexier than I thought!
Blue: Well, we've only got 13 more hours left...
(they hear screams and explosions)
Red: My bat senses are tingling.
Blue: I can hear it too dumbass.
Red: I'M BATMAN! (flies out the bar)
Blue: And the Bloser! (flies away)
Batman: The fuck?! Since when could you fly?!
Bloser: Professor Stick gave me some flying powers at the S.H.H.
Batman: Whatever, I'm still awesome.
Earl Grey: Well, well, well. If it isn't Butt-man and the Blo-suck.
Batman: (laughs) It's funny 'cause it's true!
Bloser: SHUT UP!
Earl Grey: But it sure will be an unfair fight if both of you fought me. BUTLER! Get in here!
(Gerald Butler walks in)
Gerald Butler: (annoyed) Yes boss?
Earl Grey: I want you to eliminate the blue one! The red one is MINE!
Gerald Butler: (pulls his gun out) Very well sir.
(Blue and Gerald Butler begin fighting each other)
Batman: Time to delete this error!
(Batman pulls a sword out and flies up to Earl Grey)
Earl Grey: (slashes Red's sword) HAH! I came prepared fool!
Batman: (fires a laser out of his hand) So did I!
Earl Grey: Shit.
Gerald Butler: Prepare to taste fury blue one!
Bloser: (sighs) For fuck sake. (uses his emo ray) Your parents sold you to an orphanage when you were young!
Gerald Butler: (cries) Aaah shit! (blows up)
Bloser: Too easy.
(Batman shoots several lasers at Earl Grey, disolving him)
Earl Grey: Wh- What's happening to me?!
Batman: I know that robots hate fire. AND lasers!
Earl Grey: Noooooo.... (dies)
Batman: That should do it.
Bloser: We did it!
Batman: Eesh, don't get too excited. You stay a grumpy old bastard.
Bloser: Whatever. (flies away)
Batman: I'm gonna go party with some colored girls. (flies away)