Jade is a fictional character on the web series Dick Figures. She is basically the most sexiest character next to Fox, she is very tough as she knows plenty of martial arts skills and uses her hotness for seduction rather than to waste on having a relationship with another man. Unlike Fox, Jade does enjoy going on killing sprees and can use a wide variety of weapons, she hangs out with both men and women a lot.

Social life

Jade lived in a tough nieghborhood similar to Rapper, but she has connections to one of the villians of Lightshow, Mr. Black. She learned how to defend herself when she saw Wolf going on a killing spree, coping his actions, and by the time she graduated High School, she decided to become a martial arts teacher, while occasionally working as a professional killer. She made a house that is across the street from Red and Blue, and sometimes watches over them, she also lived there to hide out from Mr. Black, as he is looking to recruit her to work on a plan involving nuclear bombs. During her childhood in grade school, Jade was quiet and weak, but after being saved by her childhood friend Jones, she became tougher and learned how to fight. She lives with Jones in her house, and often goes to the gym to work out.

Jade's Friends


Childhood friend of Jade's, Jones worked with Jade to help her become the best killer in the world, the two like to go on crazy adventures, and he helps her find powerful new weapons.


Jade isn't sexually atteacted to Red like most whores like Stacy, she enjoys going on his adventures with him and Blue. She puts him down sometimes, but they both respect each other.


Jade knows Blue can be a wuss, but she understands his pain for all the situations he is thrown into, where she goes out of her way to protect him from any danger. But the two don't hang out much since Pink finds Jade to be too sexy for Blue.


The two became friends in The Twerk Star, as they schemed to twerk around with all the men. Then in many other EP's, the two have worked very well together and are considered good friends. She and Violet also make a great duo, with Violet being the brains, while Jade brings the firepower.


Jade and Wolf don't always get along, but in Nut Jobs they did burn down a building and seem to enjoy it. So whenever they aren't competing for the top spot on the killer's list, they are friends.


Jade helped Twilight one time (in RP) and now the two can be considered friends, as Jade uses Twilight to her advantage since she's a wizard.


After meeting him one day, Jade enjoys hanging out with Randy and going to other worlds with him and Jones.

Little Blue

She met Little Blue while rock climbing and usually helps him a lot (mainly in RPs) even though they were enemies when they met. Now they're relationship is mainly Little Blue needing Jade's help for nearly every situation he's in, still Jade likes to look at Little Blue as a little brother (even though he's older) and enjoys messing with him, though she enjoys his pressence.


Jade enjoys messing with Ryle and calling him gay, but she was forever grateful of him helping her save the world in Jade's Infernal Past.


Jade knows Spark through Violet, and enjoys hanging out with him.


Jade met Shawn in Jade's Infernal Past Part Two and seem to be good friends since Jade finds Shawn to be very resourceful.


Jade doesn't know Damon all that much, but she finds his dark, mysterious look to be useful in battle.


A love/hate relationship, in Jade's Infernal Past, the two use to be childhood friends, until Inferna learned that Jones was Jade's true best friend. After nearly killing each other, the two decide to avoid each other, but also don't attack each other either. Meaning they aren't enemies.


Jade met Don thanks to Jones in The Crazy Ones, and the two have become friends as they enjoy messing with others.

Jade's Enemies

Mr. Black

Jade has a history with Mr. Black, and she does everything she can to avoid him, as everything he does is evil and hurts many people.


In Nut Jobs, Goldie attacked Jade for being with Wolf, so the two have a hatred towards each other, even though Jade has no romantic interest in Wolf


  • Can be compared to being the female Rapper, but is less dangerous than Wolf.
  • Maybe the sexiest character on Dick Figures, next to Fox.
  • Acts like a bitch at times.
  • Has the third most amount of weapons.
  • Has a machine gun turret in her upstairs window.
  • Less generous than Fox, but can be kind as well.
  • Enjoys any kind of drink.
  • Pulls out weapons at any time.
  • Has the ability to twerk really well.
  • Doesn't fall in love easily.
  • Uses her sexuality to trick people.
  • Does like to prank people.
  • Unlike Wolf, Jade has a heart.
  • Left her parents when she was young.
  • Mediates to relax when killing becomes out of control.
  • Has access to many new weapons thanks to Jones.
  • Unpredictable
  • Masturbates to fufill her sexual needs.
  • Changed her hair from stringy to long and straight.
  • Likes to say jokes, mainly Yo Momma jokes.
  • Breast size is L-cup.
  • Unlike Wolf, Rapper, and Ryle. Jade is present in danger as she feels that having tension in her life excites herself and makes her feel dangerous, she never wants to take the easy way out and use superpowers all the time.
  • Enjoys things fully explained, as she finds the unexplained annoying and lazy.

Jade's Voice

Voice of Deb (Black haired girl) from 2 Guns.

2 GUNS Movie Meet DEB (Paula Patton)01:35

2 GUNS Movie Meet DEB (Paula Patton)

Jade's Fighting Style

Style of The Bride (Blonde Woman in Yellow Suit) from Kill Bill Vol. 1

Kill Bill - The Bride VS10:03

Kill Bill - The Bride VS. Gogo and The Crazy 88's (Alternate Version)


What do you think about Jade?

The poll was created at 23:25 on March 31, 2014, and so far 10 people voted.

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