LEZ II: The Overbearing
Season 3, Episode 4
28. LEZ II The Overbearing (3)
Air date 6/24/14
Directed by IONIXMUSIC
Episode guide
Native Tongue
Derek cheers up Red with a little sorority house fun.



(Derek and Red are drinking at a bar.)

Derek: God...I can't believe we've been at this for a year.

Red: Yeah, I'm pretty tired of it.

Derek: What do you mean?

Red: Well, making constant episodes one after the other in a crazy schedule just to get...maybe one comment? Is it worth it?

(Derek looks at Red in silence.)

Derek: Yeah...I guess. But hey, at least we're having fun!

Red: Sure.

Derek: Here, I know somethin' that will cheer you up.

Red: And what is that?

(Cut to Derek and Red in a Lamborghini, driving towards the LEZ sorority house.)

Red: AW YEAH! This place is sick as hell, the bitches are awesome!

Derek: I know right!

(They crash the Lamborghini into the house.)

Derek and Red: 'Sup, ladies.

Lesbian 1: Oh my god! I remember you, Red boy!

Red: Of course of do.

Lesbian 2: We should give these guys a lap dance!

All lesbians: YEAH!

(Suddenly, all the lights go out, and a ghostly figure rises from the shadows.)

Ghost Broseph: Did you miss me?

Lesbian 3: Wait a minute, aren't you that Broseph douche that sabotaged our party a year ago?

Ghost Broseph: Uhh...

Lesbian 5: Yeah, he was!

Lesbian 2: Let's get 'em!

(They all pounce onto Ghost Broseph, but being a ghost, they have no affect.)

Ghost Broseph: You guys know that I'm a spirit, right?

Red: I know how to take care of you, Broseph!

Ghost Broseph: Hey Red! I thought we were buds! You know, homies!

Red: Bitch, you ain't nothin!

(He grabs a bottle of sage from his pocket, and chucks it at Broseph.)

Ghost Broseph: AGGGH! IT BURNS! HELP ME!

Red: Have Satan help you when you arrive, bitch.

(Broseph begins to descend into the Earth's core, and lands in Filler Hell.)

Broseph: Wait, filler hell?

Satan: Yep. Only the most useless characters in all of the Dick Sticks canon come here.

Broseph: But I'm a main character in the show this show is paroding!

(Satan looks towards ionixmusic, who is sitting at a broken down computer, writing fics.)

Satan: Is that true, O Great One?

ionixmusic: Nope.

Satan: Alright.

Broseph: WHAT?!

ionixmusic: Sorry, man. Can't mess with the canon.

(ionixmusic pulls a lever, and sends Broseph to a fiery demise.)


ionixmusic: Thanks!

(ionix pulls out a walkie talkie from his desk.)

ionixmusic: Derek, meet me in my office, please.

(Derek falls down into hell, then walks over to ionix.)

Derek: Yes, sir?

ionixmusic: Which Season 3 episodes do you plan to appear in?

Derek: Well sir, I'm thinking The Everyman, Darker and Edgier (and Sluttier), and Stultus Cadet.

(ionix enters the episodes into his schedule planner.)

ionixmusic: Alright. I'll send 'ya back up.

(He pulls a lever which brings down a tube. Derek is sucked into the tube and is sent back to the sorority house.)

Derek: Sorry, had to do something.

Red: It's all cool.

Lesbian 2: You can do me anyday.

Derek: Sure, sweetcheeks.

(Derek, Red and all the Lesbians start having a party, as the scene pans back to reveal a picture book with the party, and ionix sitting a leather chair with a pipe in his mouth.)

ionixmusic: Haha! What a wonderful story, don't you think? You know, it's weird to think that I've been reading stories to you for a year now. Although with some schedule screw-ups. It's all apart of being human, I guess. Well, I hope you enjoyed this first year of Dick Sticks storytime fun! Make sure to leave room in your calendar for the next year!

(He takes a smoke of his pipe.)

ionixmusic: Well, what are you waiting for? Run along, now, and have fun!

(He takes another smoke of the pipe but gags.)

ionixmusic: God, this shit is fucking disgusting!

(He smashes the camera, toppling it over onto the ground, as the scene ends with static.)


What did you think of this episode?

The poll was created at 23:34 on July 29, 2014, and so far 12 people voted.

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