|Last Time on Dick Figures|
|Other episodes by the author|
The Smartest Dick in the World
Blue No More
Find out what happens in the events of Dick Figures before this 'awesome' episode.
Narrator: LAST TIME ON DICK FIGURES! (displays the words said)
(shows Red driving a car with Blue in the back seat and shoots behind at some ninjas)
Red: You'll never take me alive fuckers!
Blue: Dude, this isn't such a good idea!
Red: Do I ever doubt you?
Blue: (deadpanned) YES!
(shows Broseph flying in a ship laughing manically)
Broseph: Now I'll show those bras who's the most AWESOME grey guy around!
(shows Broseph firing bullets from a plane at Red & Blue)
Red: (does kung fu style dodges and speaks French) Préparez-vous à être baisée! (Prepare to be fucked!)
(Red peforms a karate kick upwards and chops Broseph's plane in half with his arm)
(shows Red & Blue flying in a plane chasing Earl Grey in his grey plane)
Earl Grey: Quite pathetic, quite.
Red: Get this, grey douche! (shoots at the engines on E.G.'s plane)
Earl Grey: NO! Not my.. my precious grey plane!
(Earl Grey crashes his plane)
Blue: And for once, we weren't our heroes.
Red: Shut Up loser!
(shows Rapper about to kill Bruce)
Rapper: Prepare to be fucked, fucker!
Bruce: (knocks Rapper) Over my dead body!!
(Bruce punches Rapper in the water and Rapper hits his head and falls in the water. Now it cuts to Pink crying)
Blue: Pink, I can explain!
Pink: (cries) WHY would you miss out on my birthday!?
Pink: (strangely) I wanna kill you.
(Pink shoves Blue out her house and he falls to the ground, now it shows Red, Blue, L.T., Pink, Rapper & Raccoon looking fearfully at a giant shadow)
Blue: Is this.... the end?
Red: (cries) But I haven't fucked my 1,000,000th woman yet!
Lord Tourettes: (cries) Goodbye sweet SHIT as I know it!
Raccoon: We sharr find rife great in da afterrife.
Blue: Pink, I'm sorry for before!
Pink: (hugs Blue) I LOVE YOU BLUE!
(the shadow blackens the screen and everyone screams)
Narrator: AND NOW CONTINUING THIS SHOW!
(shows Red & Blue sitting on a park bench waiting for a bus looking bored)
Red: This is so lame as shit!
Blue: Dude, just be patient!
Red: Dude screw this! I'm gonna go steal a helicopter! (runs away)
Blue: Red! Don't do it!
(shows two guards standing outside the helicopter exibit, Red approaches)
Guard #1: Sir, you have no right to be here.
(Red ignores the request and kicks both the guards into a wall. Red runs inside and runs into many more guards. The guards charge at Red with weapons but Red shoots his laser at all of them then defines gravity and floats up to where the helicopters are being held. There a giant guard stands guard ready to fight Red)
Red: (shocked) Shit, where's Lad when you need him?
(timecut to Blue still sitting on the park bench when Red walks up to him with the giant's head)
Blue: Let me guess, you couldn't steal the helicopter.
Red: But at least I get a new head for my wall! (thinks) Along with my boob wall!
Blue: (facepalms) I hate you right now.
-Episode Ends, almost-
Narrator: NEXT TIME ON DICK FIGURES (shows words said)
(shows Red & Blue fighting ninjas)
Red: (speaks Japanese) 私にあなたのchalmienを手渡す! (Hand me your chalmien!)
-Episode REALLY Ends-
- This Episode is a spoof of Annoying Orange - Previously On