You coming or what?
|Other episodes by the author|
Forest Of Memories
Hope and Don switch powers, and have to go on a cave adventure to switch them back. Will they die? Probably. Let's just see how this play's out.
(Don and Hope enter the "ancient mysteries and stuff" shop.)
Raccoon: Herro, and wercome to my-
Hope: Blah blah.. our friend said this is a cool shop, I don't see much.
Don: (Hits her over the head) Be polite!
Raccoon: Oh, you don't think my shop is coor? I'rr show you. (Raccoon takes out a clear crystal.) This crystar has the power-
Hope: Oo! Shiny! Gimme! (grabs the crystal) Awesome!
Don: Hope! Give me that! Before you break it!
Hope: I'm not going to break it!
Don: I don't trust you. Give it.
Don: Hope! Give it! (Don grabs the crystal)
Hope: Hay! (Chrysler grab the crystal and Don's hand and the two end up in a tug of war over it)
Don: Let go!
Hope: Never! (Suddenly the crystal began to glow, caused a huge explosion and knocked Don and Hope to opposite sides of the room as the crystal falls and shatters).
Don: Fuck... you.. Hope.
Raccoon: (Comes up from behind the counter) You have-a done it now..
Hope: Whatcha talkin' about badger man?
Raccoon: You have swapped abirities erectromagnetically
Hope: (chuckles) Erectro.
Don: (Face palms and thinks in her head) Dumb ass.
Hope: I HEARD THAT!
Hope: You called me a dumb ass.
Don: No I didn't. (Realizes) HOPE! I THINK WE SWITCH POWERS!
Raccoon: That is-a what I just said.
Don: Well Sorry!
Hope: Wait, you mean I have your crazy brain powers? AND you have my anger related straight?
Hope: YES! THINK ABOUT THE DESTRUCTION I CAN CAUSE!
Don: Don't you fucking dare, or i'll gut you like a sheep.
Hope: Let me try this out! (Hope attempts to move the rock Kitty Amazing but fails and causes her head to spark as she flew back against the wall.) Shit..
Don: You can't control my powers they take years of practice. (To Raccoon.) How the fuck do we get our powers back?
Raccoon: You must traver inside of a The Cave of Enrightenment.
Raccoon: There you might find a crystar rike-a this one, which has the possibirity of changing your abirities back.
Don: So you expect us to go explore inside some cave, to find some crystal that might or might not be there and might or might not change our powers back.
Don:(Annoyed tone) Let's go.
Hope: YAH! CAVE ADVENTURE BITCHES!
(Time lapse; Hope and Don are about to get in a car.)
Don: Fine. We'll go the forest and then look around for the cave. (Hope and Don get in the car)
(Hope starts the car up and speeds away)
Don: They'll catch you doing this!? This is the speed limit were going to DIE!
Hope: THE THRILL IS IN THE DANGER! WHOO! (Hope continues to drive the car increasingly fast.)
Don: LOOK OUT! (there are 4 cars in front of their car about to crash.)
Hope: (Presses on the gas and causes the car to flip over the other cars and land safe with a few mild damages.) FUCK YEAH!
Don: (Gags) Fuck no.
(Hope makes a turn into a forest knocked down a bunch of trees causing more damage to the car.)
Hope: SCREW ROAD SAFETY LAWS!
Don: We're going to die!
(Hope Dodges a few more trees and a bear, as the car approach a cliff.)
Don: We're fucked!
Hope: Don't be such a downer! (Hope stops the car seconds before falling off the cliff.)
Don: (pants) ...That...Was...Horrible...
Hope: THAT WAS AWESOME!
Don: (covers her mouth and gags) I think I'm going to be sick.
Hope: (exited) I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK!
Don: Let's Just go.
Hope: Fine, Let's go.
(Time lapse; Don and Hope are in front of the cave that seems to be blocked by a boulder.)
Don: Fuck. How are we supposed to get in?
Hope: I GOT DIS SHIT! I can move it using your powers!
Don: YOU CAN'T! MY POWERS ARE TOO MUCH FOR YOUR TINY BRAIN!
Hope: But I will try (Hope attempts to move the boulder with her mind, but it ends up shattered into a bunch of pieces.) ... Umm.. I DID IT! (Hope sits down on a ledge.) I'm so good at this.
Don: (Face palm.) You coming or what?
Hope: Beat ya there! (Hope runs into the cave, ran pass a puddle and splash some water on Don.)
Don: What have I got myself into?
(Time lapse; Hope is running and smacks into a cave wall witch is revealed to be a dead end)
Hope: WHAT IS THIS? WHO PUT THIS WALL HERE!?
Don: (Catches up) Oh damn it, REALLY? REALLY!? (Shouting to the sky.) YOU COULDN’T GIVE ME A BREAK FOR ONE DAY!
Hope: Uh, Don... I think we have some company... (camera zooms out to reveal a bunch of bats.)
Don: Don't… Make… A sound…
Hope: YOUR MAKING A SOUND! (Covers her mouth) Oops.
(The bats wake up and start attacking )
Don: WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SCREAM!? I'LL KILL YOU IF THE BATS DON'T!
Hope: Good! get angry!
Don: GOOD!? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?
Hope: My strength is fueled by emotion.
Don: WELL WHOOP-DE-DO! HOW IS THAT GOING TO HELP US HERE!?
Hope: Punch the wall!
Don: WHAT TYPE OF PERSON IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD PUNCH A WALL!?
Hope: Bitch, who said I was in my right mind? PUNCH IT!
Don: FUCK IT! (Don punching the cave wall, and shatters it to reveal another tunnel.) Whoa...
Hope: Told you. Hurry up! (Hope runs into the tunnel followed by Don.)
(The bats stay in the room and go back to hanging on the cave wall.)
Hope: Too slow byatch! (trips and falls.) WHAT THE HELL? FUCK ASS ROCK! STUPID PIECE OF SHIT!
Don: Calm down you just tripped!
Hope: ON A STUPID ROCK! FUCK THIS ROCK! (Kicks the rock and it comes back and hits her in the face.) Oh! SO THAT’S HOW YOU WANNA PLAY IT? FUCKING ROCK! (Suddenly Hopes eyes glow red-ish for one second and cause a small shaking in the cave.)
Don: You can't get mad!!! Look, your powers are fueled by anger, mine are fueled by focus. If you get too mad the powers will go haywire, you can just return tons of things in just 5 seconds.
Hope: (calming down) Define "tons of things"
Don: It goes on a scale of "Breaking a bunch of windows and glasses" to "Sending the world of its orbit into the Sun"
Don: Ya don't say? Now let's go!
(Time lapse; Don and Hope walk into another room in the cave.)
(Camera zoom out to reveal the room is a huge bright room, with a waterfall on the side and a crystal standing on the platform in the middle.)
Don: THERE IT IS!
(Don and Hope to run the crystal. When they approach it Don leans in to pick it up slowly)
Hope: (grabs it.) Just give me that!
Don: Not again. Look, we both have to be holding. (Hope and Don both grab the crystal, but nothing happens.)
Hope: ... ANY MINUTE NOW!
Don: Last time does happen we were both using our powers, so just use them.
Hope: Have you not been paying attention lately? I CAN'T!
Don: Yes, you can! Just focus.
Hope: … OK… focus.. (the crystal starts glowing.)
Don: It's working! (The crystal sends out an explosion and switches their powers back.)
Hope: Did it work?
Don: I don't know think of something.
Hope: Okay (thinks).
Hope: YES! IT WORKED! (A growling noise is heard of screen). Wow I guess I need food..
Don: That wasn't your stomach, retard. It sounded kind of like... FUCK.
Don: I think out might be- (About 20 coyotes burst into the room.) yeah, that.
Hope: What are those?
Don: They're coyotes, dumb fuck!
Hope: Are they friendly? Please tell me the friendly.
Don: They are about as friendly as... well... FUCKING COYOTES!
Hope: What do we do?
(The coyotes start walking closer to them.)
Don: I don't know but I hope that they eat you first. Maybe I'll give me some time to get away.
(Hope hits Don over the head)
Don: I was joking! ....maybe.
(Hope Glares at Don)
Don: Relax I got an idea. Get down.
Don: Just duck and cover, okay?
(Hope gets on the cave floor.)
Hope: (Sarcastically) Oh wow! All my problems are solved! Now I won't get eaten by the FUCKING CAVE COYOTES!
Don: Quiet okay. I got this.
(Don focuses her power on her mind, as the coyotes get close.)
Don: (Unleashes a powerful explosion, kills the coyotes and caused some damage to the cave.)
Hope: Holy crap.
Don: (Falls over weakly) Uhh…
Hope: That was awesome! Why didn't you tell me you could do that when I had your powers! I would have totally abused that!
Don: You could barely control my powers, do you really think that- (the cave starts to rumble)
Hope: What was that?
Don: I think the explosion is causing the cave to fall!
Don: We'll never be able to make it back to the entrance on time we’re going to die!
Hope: (thinks) We don't necessarily have to go through the entrance.
Don: Hope, I know what you're thinking and I don't approve! (The cave shakes some more and a bolder falls right next to Don, almost crushing her.)
Hope: No choice! (Hope grabs Don and pushes her off the water fall, and then Hope jumps in too.) WEEE!
Don: FUCK YO- (Don lands in the water safe.) I'm alive, holy crap!
Hope: Waterfall bitches! (Hope land in the water right next to Don.) That was fun!
Don: YOU PUSHED ME OFF A WATERFALL!
Hope: Don't lie that was awesome.
Don: ... I really Fucking hate you right now.
Hope: I'm used to it.
Don: Let's Just go home
Hope: Finally something we can agree on.