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ResErection Fail

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ResErection Fail
ResErection Fail
The (somewhat) promo poster.
Air date May 25, 2012
Written by CookieEyes
Other episodes by the author

Sailing Out To Death

House Party

 

Plot

This takes place before the events of Pleasure Cruise. That's all I can really say.

Transcript

(Broseph and Darla are shown entering a graveyard.)

Broseph: (tired voice) So Darla, now that we're here, could you please explain to me why we have to be here this late at night?

Darla: Since that Gerald told me that he's going to kill Jacques Bond tomorrow, might as well give him a little treat for if he does make it back alive. (They approach Earl Grey's grave.) Sixteen weeks ago, Batman and Bloser killed my best friend, Earl, and we got to try and bring him back.

Broseph: (yawns) How are we going to do that? You're a universe traveler, not a witch. You don't even know how to resurrect someone from the dead.

Darla: (picks up a book of spells) Indigo gave me this book on magic spells. I may not know much about resurrection magic, but she said this might help if you chant the words out loud.

Broseph: (starting to slowly shut eyes his eyes) Man, you are one crazy, talking, girl... (quietly lets out a slight snicker)

Darla: (starts chanting) From this day forth, your life will rise

Everyone will be shocked, for they do recall your demise

Your ghost will enter your body which is the portal

Now open your eyes once more, and live as immortal

(There is a huge flash of a magenta light coming from the ground near the grave. Broseph and Darla watch as the shadow of a monster emerges from the ground. The shadow fades and the monster seems to look similar to an Aerodactyl, only that the eyes were a dark pink color and it had bigger wings. After an awkward silence, the monster zips past the two in a millisecond and flies towards the city at a normal flying speed. The camera goes back to Broseph and Darla, whose eyes widen in horror as magenta flashes (along with the sounds of laser beams) are coming from the city. People in the city can be heard screaming off-screen.)

Broseph: (tired look after a long silence) That was your fault.

Darla: (still looking horrified) No crud, Sherlock...

Broseph: So any more "bright" ideas, Little Miss Einstein?

Darla: (turns to him with a determined look) I've got plenty of ideas, Broseph. My plans haven't gone against me just yet.

Broseph: True. (faces the city with worry) But... (shows them with their backs facing the camera as they watch the monster destroying the city with it's laser eyes) ...this plan sure went against the city...

(Time lapse. Shows the two at Darla's tent with a grey robot Batman in front of them.)

Darla: I give you, the Nega-Batman 2! I thought that if we don't have any villain left to defeat Batman, then I thought building a villain would be the next big thing.

Broseph: So let me get something straight. Your plan for tonight was to bring your friend back from the dead, and yet you had built a villain all by yourself to fill in for him-?!

Darla: (deep and whispery voice) Don't bring logic into this!

(Darla presses a button on a remote and the robot begins to march towards the exit of the tent.)

Nega-Batman 2: Girls! Boobs! Boner! Swag! Girls! Boobs! Boner! Swag!

(It leaves the tent while still chanting it's words and uses it's jet pack to fly into the city, which is still being destroyed by the monster from before. The camera goes back to Broseph and Darla as the screams of the citizens are heard again.)

Broseph: (sarcastically) Smooth move, smart guy.

Darla: Well, looks like we're gonna have to do this the old fashion way.

Broseph: Come one already! It's about 1:30 AM!

(Time lapse. Darla is shown digging into the ground at Earl Grey's grave with a shovel as Broseph lies on the ground sleeping. Darla then throws a bag of what is left of Earl Grey at Broseph's head, waking him up immediately.)

Darla: You carry the bag. We've got to get back to the tent before any stick figure sees us.

(The two are shown leaving the graveyard. In the background, it shows that one quarter of the city has been destroyed.)

(Time lapse. Broseph places the bag on a flat rock outside of Darla's tent.)

Broseph: Whooooaaa, this is totally rad, dude. (starts to poke the bag)

Darla: Listen here, Broseph. What we are about to do here must never leave this location, for if any stick figure were to know of this gruesome upcoming action, they would simply label this as the ultimate crime against Batman, Bloser, and the entire city...that and I don't want to lose you like how I lost Earl.

Broseph: Well, what are we suppose to do with a small, useless bag?

Darla: (voice rising) Broseph, you've got to take this seriously! You can't tell any stick figure, because we'll be in-

Broseph: You know, you can go ahead and say "anybody" instead of "any stick figure". Whenever you say "any stick figure", it makes me think you're just trying to remind everyone that we're stick figures, when it's real obvious that we are. (Darla glares at him) Not everyone here is a mindless retard, and I think that even the stupidest person in the entire universe can tell that we're stick figures, so... (takes a sip of coffee that was near him the whole time)

Darla: You know what? I actually can't blame you for getting stern with me there. This is actually the only day I've actually referred to anybody as "any stick figure".

Broseph: Good for you.

(Time lapse. Darla puts the end of an electrical wire on the bag and walks over to a somewhat electrical device, where the other end of the wire is attached to.)

Broseph: So, you're saying that if you turn that thing on, it's going to shock the bag and it'll bring Earl Grey back?

Darla: Correction. You're going to turn the device on.

Broseph: (sighs) Fine.

(Darla walks over to the bag and Broseph turns on the device in a rather lazy manner.)

(TWO HOURS LATER)

Darla: That's enough! Pull the switch.

(Broseph pulls the switch to turn the device off and the electricity fades away. The bag is now burnt from the electricity. Broseph and Darla look at the bag, waiting for something to happen.)

Broseph: Yo Earl Grey...y'alright?

(For a long awkward silence, Darla moves her head closer to the bag to listen for any signs of life.)

Darla: I don't get it! When they shock dead bodies in movies, they always come back to life.

Broseph: Maybe we preformed it the wrong way. Either that, or we needed to put the pieces together.

Darla: You know what? It's bloody late, and I'd hate to do all that again. (disappointingly hands Broseph the shovel) Oh well. Go bury him again.

(Broseph watches her until she goes back into her tent. When she is gone, Broseph glares at the bag and suddenly whacks it with the shovel.)

Broseph: ...Didn't get me a birthday present last April. (walks away) Fuckin' biiiiiitch. (takes the bag before he is completely off-screen.)

-Episode Ends-

(After credits)

Red: Hey! How come we didn't show up at all?!

Blue: Shut! UP!

What do you think about this episode?
 
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The poll was created at 17:16 on June 24, 2012, and so far 4 people voted.

Trivia

  • This episode based off of MAGIC.MOV, an episode from an animated parody series of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
  • This episode took place a day before the events of Pleasure Cruise, and Darla said that Batman and Bloser killed Earl Grey "sixteen weeks ago". Adventures of Batman & The Bloser aired on Sept. 22, 2011 and Pleasure Cruise aired on Jan. 12, 2012. This shows this episode has a time gap between the air dates of both episodes.

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