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Science No More
Science No More
Science... could be bad.....
Air date 1-10-2013
Written by YoshiRocker13
Directed by YoshiRocker13
Location City
Other episodes by the author

The True Girlfriend

War of the Dicks

 Everyone finds Professor Stick's inventions to be bad and that it's a bad reason to create them. Professor Stick retires from science right when something bad is about to happen.

Characters

Transcript

(Professor Stick is seen holding a ray gun)

Professor Stick: Time to find a test subject for my latest invention!

(Red is seen walking down the street)

Red: (drunk) Hey, hey, hey, hey Prof.

Professor Stick: Goodness Red! Have you been drinking that brown stuff?

Red: You mean brown shit?

Professor Stick: No! BEER!

Red: Dibs! (drinks beer) Hey what's that?

Professor Stick: Well It's my-

Red: GIMME! (snatches gun and shoots at himself)

Professor Stick: Oh dear.

(Red notices boobs, hair, and a vagina growing on him)

Red: (now a female) The fuck!?

Professor Stick: Never fear! I can-

Red: This is AWESOME!

Professor Stick: Hmm?

Red: Now I can make out with myself!

Professor Stick: (disgusted) Gross! (walks away)

Red: (rips off bras) Who wants to fuck me now bitches!?

Professor Stick: Maybe I should just get rid of that one.

(Prof Stick accidentally bumps into Jess who drops her shopping bags)

Professor Stick: Oh dear! I'm terribly sorry!

Jess: It's alright. I dropped these already.

(both reach for a carrot as they bang heads)

Jess: Ow! Sorry!

Professor Stick: (groans) It's all good. I too am clumsy.

Jess: Hey, thanks for the help. What's your name?

Professor Stick: My name is Henry, but most people call me Professor Stick.

Jess: Why's that?

Professor Stick: I am an inventor!

Jess: (excited) Ooh! Nice! Well, I better get going.

Professor Stick: Would you like to use one of these warp remotes?

Jess: (blushes) Um, no thanks. I feel like walking anyway.

Professor Stick: Very well. Cheerio! (walks away)

Jess: (silently) See ya. (walks away)

(shows Blue walking with a chart list)

Blue: Now let's see. I need more bottles and I-

Professor Stick: Why hello young Blue! Fine day today isn't it?

Blue: Ugh, Prof. I'm kinda busy. I gotta buy some more supplies for my baby.

Professor Stick: Your having a baby?

Blue: Yup. Me and Pink are having a baby.

Professor Stick: I have this warp pad to teleport you there faster!

Blue: Uh, okay I guess. (takes it) How do you use this thi- (dissapears)

(Blue suddenly appears in the air and falls in the lake)

Blue: The fuck!? How was I suppose to work this thing!?

(Blue notices crocodiles surrounding him)

Blue: Aah Fu-

(cuts to Lord Tourettes skipping through the street)

Lord Tourettes: I like to SHIT! I like to FUCK! I like to FUCKTITASSES!

Professor Stick: Goodness young man! You have tourettes syndrome!

Lord Tourettes: Well of course I FUCKING do!

Professor Stick: I know what'll help!

(he pours a drink in L.T.'s mouth)

Lord Tourettes: Ooh! Tastes like magic! (realises) What the fudge!? What did you do to my syndrome!?

Professor Stick: Why I cured it! Now you won't swear in front of anyone!

Lord Tourettes: B-But I-

Professor Stick: You can thank me later. I'm kinda opening my shop now. (walks away)

Lord Tourettes: (cries) My syndrome! My long kept syndrome.... IS GONE! (runs away crying)

(Professor Stick is now at his shop and hears a bell)

Professor Stick: Can I help you?

(he notices Blue & Lord Tourettes glaring angrily at him while Red (still female) dances around.

Red: (sings) Naked boobs all day! Something great I must praise!

Blue: Professor Stick! We've had enough of your inventions!

Lord Tourettes: I WANT MY SYNDROME BACK!

Professor Stick: I can create an antidote.

Blue: NO! You must STOP making these stupid inventions!

Professor Stick: But their smart! And they help!

Blue: WHY would you make these weird inventions!? For fucking money!!?

Professor Stick: But-

Blue: SHUT DOWN!

(Blue knocks down the sign and walks away. Lord Tourettes slaps Prof. Stick and walks away. Red continues dancing)

Red: I loved mah invention!

(Professor Stick is seen watching the sunset)

Professor Stick: True. My inventions are random. Why should I even create them anyway? I'm leaving! For good!

(cuts to Jess walking down the street where Gang Members await)

Gang Member 1: (spanish) Aha! Here comes a chicko!

Gang Member 2: Which we shall fuck and take her cash!

Jess: Wh- Who's there?

Gang Member 1: Oh, only us. (laughs)

Jess: P-please don't hurt me!

Gang Member 2: We're going to fuck you though!

Jess: What!?

Gang Member 1: So we can take your money?

Jess: But It's mine!

Gang Member 2: Ours now!

(Professor Stick notices what's going on)

Professor Stick: Goodness gracious!

Jess: S-someone help me!

Professor Stick: (groans) I shouldn't use this science again! But that girl needs help! (pulls out a potion) Hopefully this helps.

(he throws the potion as it pours on Jess)

Jess: Huh?

(she begins shooting lasers out her eyes and melting the gang members)

Gang Member 1: I regret nothiiiing! (melts)

Gang Member 2: No you don't! (melts)

Jess: What the fuck?

Professor Stick: A-are you alright lady?

Jess: Yeah I'm fine a- Hey! I know you! Henry right?

Professor Stick: Yes that's me. I gave you that potion to help you. But I can make it come off.

Jess: That'll be good. Thanks anyway.

Professor Stick: Well I'd best be going.

Jess: W-where are you going?!

Professor Stick: No one wants my inventions anymore.

Jess: (puts hand on his shoulder) But I do! Your inventions are cool!

Professor Stick: Really?

Jess: (hands him paper) Call me sometime. We should catch up!

Professor Stick: That's great.

Red: (still a female, comes up to Prof Stick) Hey Prof. Tell me do you like to fuck?

Professor Stick: Aah Fu-

-end-

Trivia

Poll

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The poll was created at 02:55 on October 2, 2013, and so far 1 people voted.

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