|Air date||Friday 15th June 2012|
|Other episodes by the author|
Red, Blue, Lord Tourettes, The Raccoon and Trollzor set out on an epic journey to find the ultimate Flame War asshole that keeps beating them.
(Red, Blue, Trollz0r and Lord Tourettes are playing Modern Flame War 3)
Lord Tourettes: Well this is FUCKING brilliant! (Giggles)
(Trollz0r's avatar kills a yellow opponent)
Trollz0r: Headshot, Bitch!
(Blue's avatar is knifed in the head by a grey avatar)
(A familiar voice comes through the radio): Aha! Prepare for a teabagging motherfucka! (Teabags Blue's dead avatar)
(Lord Tourettes avatar is shot by the same grey avatar)
Lord Tourettes: Oh SHIT!
Red: Just me and you now, Crazy Face!
Trollz0r: Yeah! (Trollzor's avatar and Red's avatar are killed in quick succession)
Trollz0r: (FFFFUUUU/Rage Face) FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU.......!
Red: Who is this asshole?
Blue: They must be pretty good to beat Trollzor and you!
Red: We gotta find this dick!
Lord Tourettes: Well how the FUCK are we gonna find him?
Trollz0r: (No longer doing Rage Face) I could do da hack thing!
Blue: Yeah! Great Idea!
(Trollz0r is at a computer; the other three are crowded around him)
Blue: Apparently, this douchebag lives in England!
Red: Lets go then!
Blue: Wait! We can't take on this guy, especially if he is British! We'll need a warrior...
All: But Who?
(A lightbulb appears above Blue)
(The gang are in The Raccoon's appartment)
The Raccoon: I'll be delighted to join you on your quest. But on one condition!
Raccoon: I can join you next time you have a game night
Blue: Thats fine
Raccoon: Excellent. Onwards, to England!
Lord Tourettes: Yeah, BITCH!
(Red, Blue, The Raccoon, Lord Tourettes and Trollz0r are in a plane wearing parachutes)
Trollz0r: I see da target (Points at a large mansion-type building surrounded by fields and trees)
Lord Tourettes: Lets go, ASSHOLES!
(All five jump out of the plane, open parachutes and land next to the mansion)
Blue: Oh Shit!
(Everyone sees an army of butlers coming towards them)
Raccoon: Lets do this!
(The Raccoon pulls out two swords, while the others pull out an assortment of guns. The two sides engage in a huge battle, with Lord Tourettes shouting random swearwords in the proccess. Eventually Red&Co win)
Red: Who were those douchebags?
Trollz0r: Whoever dey were, de came from in dere (points towards mansion)
Blue: We need to get in!
Trollzor: (Challenge Accepted face) Challenge Accepted!
(Red places some C4 on a wall, blowing a hole in it. They all go through the hole and end up in a large hall with a familier Grey figure in a chair at the other end)
Red: (Gasp) YOU!
(Grey Figure turns out to be Earl Grey)
Earl Grey: AHA! Its Batman, his pathetic conpanion The Bloser. And they've bought along some friends. A cute little Raccoon, a troll and a hat-wearing green child! How terrible! Quite!
Red: (Narrow Eyes and Deep Voice) Lets Do This!
(Epic music starts playing as Earl Grey and some butlers engage in a battle. Trollzor and Lord Tourettes battle a majority of the butlers; Trollzor has his Troll face on, and Lord Tourettes swears everytime he kills a butler): FUCK! SHIT! ASS! DOUCHE! COCK! DICK! BITCH! (Blue and The Raccoon take on the main butlers; Blue shoots them in the head, while The Raccoon stabs them. Red participates in an airborne fight against Earl Grey; Eventually Red kung-fu kicks Earl Grey several times in the face, stomach and crotch, injuring him)
Earl Grey: (In his death row) Oh bugger! Guess thats the end of my teabagging (Dies)
Trollzor: (Awwww Yeah Face) AWWWW YEAH MOTHAFUCKA
Red: IT IS DONE!
Blue: Um... What do we do now?
Red: I know! (Starts teabagging Earl Grey's corpse)
Blue: Dude, what the fu...