|Third Day with Fifi|
Well um, I wanna say....
|Air date||May 2013|
|Written by||YoshiRocker13 & Alpha-Lonewolf|
|Location||Cookie Shop, Streets, Fancy Resteraunt|
|Other episodes by the author|
Killers & Little Girls
While spending yet ANOTHER day with Fifi, Bruce meets a girl who likes his style. But Bruce doesn't want her to think Fifi is Bruce's girlfriend, so what will Bruce decide??
(Shows Bruce in a cookie store with rage)
Bruce: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR OUT OF COOKIES!!??
Store Manager: Sorry sir. Some dude named Snake bought the rest of the cookies last week.
Bruce: (points to Fifi) This girl wanted cookies now GIVE HER COOKIES!!! (shows Fifi crying behind Bruce)
Fifi: (crying) I miss the cookies...
Bruce: SO MAKE WITH THE COOKIES! (pulls out gun)
Store Manager: Alright alright! I'll order some!
Bruce: NO! YOU'LL MAKE SOME!!!
4 HOURS LATER
(Bruce & Fifi walk out of the store with Fifi holding a giant bag of cookies)
Bruce: (pissed) I can't believe I had to pay $200 just so YOU could have cookies!!!
(Bruce & Fifi arrive at Bruce's streets)
Bruce: Alright Fifi well I gotta go home. Wolf needs you now.
Fifi: HE DOES!? (runs over Bruce to find Wolf) I'M COMING FOR YOU MY WOLFY!!!
Bruce: (laughs) That's one crazy girl (starts to walk home but bumps into a light blue girl)
Light Blue: (drops purse) Oh my goodness!
Bruce: Oh sorry! Let me he- (stares at the girl as he picks up her stuff)
Light Blue: (takes things) Oh! Thank you.
Bruce: No problem. Name's Bruce
Jess: My name's Jess. I just moved here. I don't really know anything around here.
Bruce: (thinks in head) But I want Fifi to be my girl! Maybe I could just be friends with Jess (speaks) Well I would be most happy to show ya around!
Jess: Oh! Thank you! (they walk off)
(they are at Drunken Beer Tavern)
Bruce: And this is where we drink our beer. A big guy named Lad owns this place. But when you enter you should watch out.
Jess: Why? (walks in the tavern and gets greeted a punch) What the fuck!?
Bruce: (shoots the dust could and all guys die) Fuckers.
Jess: Whoa! You kill people? (Seductively) I like that.
Bruce: (nervous) Uh yeah....
(They arrive at Maulmart)
Bruce: And this is Maulmart. The biggest and bestest shopping centre ever!
Jess: So you get to buy ANYTHING here?
Bruce: You betcha!
Jess: (amazed) Wow! I've never been to a shopping centre like this!
Rapper: (walks out of Maulmart with a shopping bag) Oh yeah! With the stuff I bought I'll be able to enter the most awesome battle ever! (sees Bruce) BRUCE!!! (pulls out two swords)
Bruce: RAPPER!? (pulls out machetes) Today is going to the day you DIE!
Jess: (confused) Wait what?
Bruce: Oh Jess, this is my enemy! Rapper!! We so god damn hate each other!
Jess: What? Why?
Bruce: Long story.
Rapper: So who's this? Your girlfriend?
Jess: What? No! We're just friends! (thinks) For now.
Bruce: (thinks) Damn. I can't kill Rapper in front of a girl! (speaks) Uh how about we go Jess. (walks off with her)
Rapper: (yells) This isn't over Bruce! I WILL KILL YOU EVENTUALLY!!!!
(it's sunset and Bruce arrives at Jess' home with her)
Jess: Well today sure was a great day. Thanks for showing me around Bruce! How about we go out for dinner tomorrow?
Bruce: Uh...... sure. (thinks) Damn! I was gonna hang out with Fifi tomorrow.
Jess: Great! See ya then! (walks into her house)
Bruce: See ya! (walks off) Well it looks like I'm gonna have to ask Wolf to look after Fifi tomorrow because I can't have her following me!
(shows Wolf killing some street artists spreading blood all over his face)
Wolf: Just another killing spree and I'll be the killer of the world.
Bruce: Hey Wolf!
Wolf: Aah! (pulls out Ka-bars in defense) What the fuck Bruce!?
Bruce: Sorry Wolf but I have to ask you to watch Fifi tomorrow.
Wolf: (angered) WHAT!? THERE IS NO WAY I'M WATCHING FIFI TOMORROW WHEN I WOULD RATHER KILL SOME MORE DICKS!!!
Bruce: Well I'm afraid you have to! I'm going out with a girl tomorrow!
Wolf: (pissed) Rrrgh! FINE! But you owe me a favour!
Bruce: You got it!
(the next night it shows Bruce & Jess at a fancy resteraunt)
Jess: So tell me more about yourself.
Bruce: Well I lead a gang in the street and I seem to get along with them very well. Except when they turn on me and try to kill me so I just kick them out of the gang.
Jess: Well you sure seem like quite a good leader! Kind of....
Bruce: Well I sure do like that alot! (checks watch) Shit. I gotta go do some crime with my street gang.
Jess: Seriously? Crime?
Bruce: Oh come on! You'll learn to love it!
Jess: Yeah I should probably get going to. See ya later Bruce!
Bruce: Okay. Bye! (walks off)
(Bruce is followed by Fifi. Suddenly she sees someone eating cookies)
Fifi: FIFI SEES COOKIES!!! (runs off for the cookies)
Bruce: Oh brother.
Jess: (sees Bruce) Bruce! Hey!
Bruce: (nervous) Oh uh..... hey Jess.
Jess: What are you doing here? We finally see each other again!
Bruce: (thinks about Fifi) Yeaaaaahh.... Listen Jess I have to say....
Fifi: (comes back with cookies) Hi nice lady! Hi Stick head!
Jess: Who's this? Your girlfriend!?
Bruce: What!? She's not my girlfriend!!
Fifi: (hears what Bruce says and starts to cry) What?
Bruce: Wait. Oh no! Fifi that's not what I meant!
Fifi: You're not my friend anymore? (begins to tear up)
Bruce: Of course I'm your friend! Just not my girlfriend! (realises) Oh wait! Fifi!
Fifi: I want Wolfy! (runs off crying)
Bruce: Fifi wait!
Jess: Well now you blew it!
Bruce: (becomes really angry) I BLEW IT!?!? Fifi was like my best friend and we had a pretty good thing going! That is until YOU showed up! What is it with people getting jealous of everyone!?!?!?
Jess: What are you talking about!? She WAS your girlfriend!!
Bruce: No! She's a real idiot! What she says is when talking about girlfriends. She thinks she's a girl and she's my friend!
Jess: (confused) What!?
Bruce: YOU WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!! (runs off) SCREW YOU!! WE'RE OVER!!!!
Jess: Bruce wait!
(Wolf is seen walking with beer when Fifi jumps into Wolf's arms still crying)
Wolf: AHH! (drops beer) FIFI! What the fuck!?
Fifi: (cries) Wolfy, Stick head says he doesn't want to be my friend anymore!
Wolf: Why doesn't that work when ever i say it?
Bruce: (runs up) Fifi! Wait!
Fifi: Eek! (hides behind Wolf)
Wolf: (frustrated) What did you do to make her ruin the best part of my day?
Bruce: I was talking to my new friend Jess and she thought Fifi was my girlfriend. But when I said she wasn't, Fifi ran off crying!
Wolf: (looks to dropped mug of beer) You know I could kill you for just causing her to drop my beer alone. think of what I would do to for making her ruin my day.
Bruce: (looks at dropped mug) Seriously!? You could just buy more!!
Wolf: It was the moment of enjoying a good beer that was important! But i am willing to let you off easy if you somehow make up with Fifi. (Moves over a bit for Fifi) I talked to the big bully and he has something he wants t say to you.
Bruce: (sighs) Fifi. I'm really sorry I said you were not my friend but If I can't cheer you up, I'm sorry! Your........ your........ YOUR THE BEST GIRLFRIEND I EVER HAD!!!
Fifi: (sniffs) Really?
Fifi: (bouncy and happy again) Ha! I always knew you were my boyfriend! I never had a doubt!
Wolf: And by that she means a boy who is her friend.
Bruce: I know! (to Fifi) Come here!
Fifi: (jumps into Bruce's arms) I wuv you Stick head.
Wolf: Oh yeah and now to let you off easy (Breaks both of Bruce's legs) there all is right with the world.
Fifi: Hee hee. your legs look like noodles.
Bruce: The fuck!?
Wolf: I told you I would go easy on you